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Friday, September 07, 2007

What do you mean you thought I was dead?

So the other morning the phone rings. Kilmer is over, he's set up a matress on my floor. It's the other side of a long night of drinking, and my hungover sarcastic attitude is highly sensitive to irony. A perfect time to pick up the phone.



"Hello?"











*pause*

"I'm sorry, that is not a valid response, please press one to speak with one of ou-" *click*

what the fuck?

How appropriate. I have been anywhere but here for the last four months, and though I've been home for probably 5 days or more now, I never truly felt like I was back in civilized north america until the moment I unsuspectingly picked up the phone, only to have my 'hello' response promptly judged as invalid. By a robot. Don't judge me robot!

Since when do robots have a fucking clue about what is a valid response? Sorry robot, but in english speaking countries hello is a universally accepted greeting on the phone. You know what isn't? Telling me to press one.

The mundane struggles of modern life slowly seep back into my existence, and a strange sense of familiarity flavoured with extract of "I don't quite belong here" creeps into my awareness.

I am back.

So like two friends who haven't seen each other for a long long time, let's not bother trying to pore over EVERY detail of our hiatuses (hiati?) We'll trust that since we're such awesome friends those stories will come out eventually (and they will). Let's just glaze over the rough outline which will give context to all subsequent discourse.

Since we last chatted about jetlag and soullag I went to my WRT course, got to camp, did tripper training, led a 3 day looper, a 12 day Coulonge (Quebec), and a 24 day stint on the rivers Duchef-Ashuapmushuan (also Quebec, is anyone seeing a pattern here?). Both epic adventures.

So I concluded while talking to Deb that 12 weeks of my recent life have been spent in a place that prefers French to all other languages. I honestly feel a lack of French in my life now, on signs, on labels, in conversations going on around me. Don't get me wrong, I would never tell you I speak French, I just am used to it.

Funny how that worked out.

After camp there was of course the obligatory consumption of alcohol. This consists of:
  • Tripper Day off

  • Senior Staff and Tripper Party

  • Staff Party

  • You're back in Guelph so party with your australian friend

  • Do it again, but with a different set of camp friends

  • Party with your camp friends again cause they're having a party

And that's really nothing compared to what some have gone through. A lot of people haven't had more than 3 nights off since camp ended. My aussie friend Anna hasn't had more than 3 off since her last day off on the 20th. That's a bit of a problem. She's on a plane to Brazil tomorrow though, so hopefully she'll catch a break there.

So what is my deal? Well Colin, you asked, settling in is going great. PS, Colin brought my BSB shirt from back south america after all, and he and Sarah bought me a nice sarong also. That was my prize for being the top poster on their blog. Thanks guys.

So now my days consist of throwing uncomfortable sums of money at the annual computer problems that I get around Sept, marching through miles of red tape to get into the courses that I need, and treating myself to small gifts after months of deprivation of paycheques and material goods. I have 2 semesters left of my master's, don't ask what I'm taking. It's a course based setup now, so It's "neuro stuff" no thesis or anything, though I will have to do some writing about the project I worked on (which failed miserably). Enough about that.

Just wanted to say hi and let you know I'm alive, that is if anyone still reads this thing. Also expect my trip log to get published here, (if I can find the thing) and be more entertaining than the last one, as there's a little more spite in it, and I feel like if you paid to read this, that's what you'd pay for, pure spite.

spitefully yours

-Marcus


11 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

holy ol hannah, you are back! things here are winding down, i care even less than i always did (my counterpart told a friend of mine 'it looks like he doesn't even care' she is very perceptive) me and 4 friends are going fishing with chito in about 10 days. looking forward to it immensly. hope to hear more from you soon. say hi to guelph for me. a late november visit could happen, i am bussing it all the way back to maine, so keep an eye out.

yank

Friday, September 7, 2007 at 2:33:00 PM GMT-5

 
Blogger Marcus said...

oh HELL YES I am. . . I sent you a nice lengthy email. Say Ola to Chito Loco for me. And give a grudging nod of respect to his crocodilo. . .Pocho?

I am keeping an eye out for you, and people here eagerly await your arrival.

Friday, September 7, 2007 at 2:38:00 PM GMT-5

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Malarkyyy, you motor boatin son of a bitch, glad your back on the glorious cyber space and updating us. St kits is alright good class and people in it, i live with 5 20 year olds, so you can imagine the stuff that goes down at 3am a night before i have to start school
anyways hope the course things going well. Stay precious and gimme a shout sometime. just got me a cell. 289 668 0234

Friday, September 7, 2007 at 7:46:00 PM GMT-5

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Malarkyyy, you motor boatin son of a bitch, glad your back on the glorious cyber space and updating us. St kits is alright good class and people in it, i live with 5 20 year olds, so you can imagine the stuff that goes down at 3am a night before i have to start school
anyways hope the course things going well. Stay precious and gimme a shout sometime. just got me a cell. 289 668 0234

Friday, September 7, 2007 at 7:46:00 PM GMT-5

 
Blogger Marcus said...

wow - is this really happening? Bob, is that you? I can only assume since you said "stay precious" and mentioned St. Catharines with an old school slang term that it is you. That and the fact that you posted your cell on the internet like that. PS, awesome wedding crashers reference.

5 20 year olds? Those village idots. Seriously, they gotta be a bunch of n00bs though right? Anyway I am also hammered, walked home after a party of first year staff and students at Dan Naiman's. I'm going to grip your digits right now, before I reveal too much.

Friday, September 7, 2007 at 11:10:00 PM GMT-5

 
Blogger Marcus said...

WAIT! Yank - there is one message you need to deliver to Chito for me, in case he doesnt' remember who I am. 20 minutes into your fishing trip, completely unannounced, you need to exclaim "Gyanja Bwoat!" and see what he says. Then tell him it's from me.

Friday, September 7, 2007 at 11:46:00 PM GMT-5

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

only i would post that twice, i too am also mangled right now, um yeah i figured it was safe to post that online. um yeah thats all i got, stay even more precious, god bless
Bobber

Saturday, September 8, 2007 at 1:16:00 AM GMT-5

 
Blogger Unknown said...

miss me yet?

Saturday, September 8, 2007 at 5:34:00 PM GMT-5

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey! What's wrong with spending more than half your summer in "french country"? I'm sure you ended up here because I wasn't at camp... :)
I hope you had a good time though! Take care, MC

Sunday, September 9, 2007 at 9:33:00 PM GMT-5

 
Blogger Robertito Orton said...

dude, i see chito on a regular basis... we sell some shitty womens groups projects in his little souvenir shop. he always sings that fuckin song of his. and yes, i have shouted ganja bwoat at him while he wrassles a huge croc named pocho.

yank.

Monday, September 10, 2007 at 1:18:00 PM GMT-5

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

now i really think you might be dead.


yank.

Tuesday, October 9, 2007 at 9:48:00 AM GMT-5

 

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