Winterlude

Amongst the marking, the lack of desire to do lab work, and the tribulations of life - of which there can be many, as we all know - I have managed to keep up with doing stuff that doesn't suck. Something I've been falling behind on for a little while. Where to begin? Timmy and I headed up to Blue of a wicked day on the slopes. Though I was by myself for the most part I got some good reflecting done while testing out my new boards on the north end. All the while Timmy was on the south literally beating up the hill. He was learning to snowboard. He's quite good considering it was his second time out. But when timmy falls he ragdolls. He hits face first and pulls what you call mystery moves in the dust as it kicks up all around him, lit in the afternoon sun. If you watch carefully as timmy gracefully rolls out of his fall you can see him pound the ground with his fist, or even throw in the occasional headbutt. Atta boy timmy, don't let the bastards grind you down. Seriously though, it was a kick ass day. Perfect weather, great snow, good company - we had a blast. Also in the past 4 days or so I've gotten back outside to take pix, something I've desperately missed, doing. I managed to capture this black and white stitch of three shots. Timmy doesn't like the jet and the powerlines, but I think they belong there. At least the jet. . . Anyway, it's nice to get a little piece of your life back that you've missed. My folder for February was starting to look pretty weak, and that shit is not cool. Now it's been filling up. Yesterday Tim and I went out to catch some more shots. Got some okay ones, but largely fruitless. Basically it was nice to get out in the sun again. So here is Gaby. I told Gaby a long time ago I would get her in this thing and never did. Now I have a reason though. You know those little things that just make you laugh your ass off weeks after they happen? Gaby is that little thing. Look at her - you can just see Gaby's entire personality in that shot. She's emoting there. That's Gaby extremely disappointed at the Mackie Hilborn for not being at our party a few months ago. Don't you just feel like you've done something wrong? I do. So you never know what Gaby's going to say next, but you can bet your ass it will make you laugh. Anyway so how do I know Gaby Leith? Well we go way back if you really think about it. If you ask either of us we'll probably both bring up the same event. We were at camp, I think I was a senior boy and Gaby was probably an Inter girl or something like that. We were both into Drama though so we were in the same play: East of the sun West of the moon. I'm sure Gaby remembers what it was all about. I was supposed to be some kind of prince, I remember that. We did it theatre in the round style, so we were all in Centre Camp. I was supposed to be a bear that would turn to a prince I think. All I remember is parading around centre camp with an Arnold Schwarzenegger accent (it wasn't overdone in those days), which I slowly turned into an angry scottish accent as the play progressed to mark my slow metamorphosis from Bear to Prince. Yeah, I had talent huh? Real creative, especially since I was only 16. . . So for some reason Gaby was supposed to ride around on my back during these interludes. Gaby help me out here, what the fuck was the point of all this? I don't know, but it was fun, and everyone thought it was real cute that a senior boy was carrying an inter girl around in a play I guess. . . But I digress. Oh how far we've come. Gaby msged me from the library yesterday where she was trying to do work, and for five minutes I think I didn't stop laughing. Stop me if you don't find any of this funny, but those of you who know Gaby (Yank) you will laugh at everything she said. I msged Gabbo to figure out who the fuck that bitch girl was that wouldn't drive me home. She informed me she was Naiman's friend and that she walked home as well. . . so there was that.

About a minute went by and the messages started. "There's someone eating chips in the cubicle next to me and it's sooooo annoying." "Seriously, I can hear their jaw crunching and I want to kill them."

I laughed.

"OHH MY GOOOD IT WON'T STOP"

I laughed some more.

"Seriously, I am so conscious of that. When I go to the library I only bring soft foods, things that won't crunch. I take off my headphones and check the volume, some people just don't care!"

Now I'm in stitches over the soft foods comment

"Marcus, I don't know what to do. I hear a bag of something else opening now, I'm scared."

"I don't know if I should yell at them, or buy chips, but if I buy chips they will think that that is acceptable and it's SO NOT."

ahhahahahah

I told her I thought it would be a good idea to buy some tostitos or crispers and chew them elaborately, you know, enunciate and chew with diction so that they knew you were doing it on purpose. . . I barely got that sentence out

And Gaby was more preturbed than ever. She was telling me how sensitive she was when she was in the library, that she stared people down regularly.

"OH MY GOD - this guy just answered his cellphone, and it had the most gayass ring."

"Seriously, sorry to use gay but that's what it was! His whole fucking conversation was 'yeah, I'm in the library. K - peace.' FFFFUUUCK YOU!"

Again I am dying now. I could barely get a word in edgewise before

"Oh my god he's on it again - seriously what the fuck?"

"Why is it that when people answer cellphones all social etiquette goes out the window? I don't come up in the middle of your conversation and interrupt you! And turn off your gayass ring!"

At this point I have tears in my eyes, picturing Gaby just boiling in her little cubicle, want to kill chips cruncher next to her (as she called him/her) and break the dude's cellphone in half and throw the pieces in his face. ..

"I also hate people who whisper. What the hell is your problem? It's just as distracting as talking, it's still a sound."

hahahha

"Marcus I think I need to get out of the library."

I agreed, and I asked her why she didn't, and this is when I really laghed.

"Marcus, it sucks here, but forgot my keys. I already went home once to see if anyone was home and no one was."

"Also, I do have a huge mid term coming up, and I'm sitting here all by myself rotting away and I have NO FOOD."

I'm giggling again

"And when I went home, I tried to break into my own house by climbing the roof to the top window."

"I slipped and fell. Like - I actually fell off my roof."

I cannot stop laughing at this point - I am so entertained. Thank you Gaby. I'm sorry you fell off your roof, and I'm sorry you were starving in the library, and good luck on your midterm. You are priceless.

So today I was about to eat my lunch when Jocelyn, my neighbour, walks in. She was sick and tired of looking at these giant icicles, precariously perched, ready to fall, dangling from our eve. They weren't in a particularly dangerous spot, but she couldn't handle the sight of them and wanted to get them down. Seeing as how we bought about 500 apples last weekend that we had NO use for other than spud gun ammo and to watch rot away, Graeme and I gleefully ran outside. We killed 15 minutes whipping rotting apples at this icicle. Half the time we'd hit the dude's window behind it. We broke of some substantial pieces of this thing, but the dude was glaring at us unimpressed from behind the pane (which we totally applesauced), and lest he call the cops on us we ended it at 15 minutes. Also because I shattered a nalgene full of water that on the concrete after it dropped from icicle height, and also because we ran out of apples, and also because the spud gun probably created somewhat of a disturbance when it went off. By the way it also turned it's ammo into applesauce before impact, so that was no use. My friend Erin suggested the use of a hot super soaker full of saline, but if I know icicles, these fuckers will spitefully fall all on their own when I'm not looking. Probably by tomorrow morning. We did get a good piece of them though, and that was a good way to break up an afternoon. Fuck you icicles. You can see Graeme giving it his all in that pic, that big patch is the motherlode we were aiming for. . .